Coke Kills Voice Mail

I suppose you don't always think about Coca-Cola being a "cutting-edge" company. We usually reserve software and technology companies for that label. Coca-Cola is all about doing things consistently and cranking out an iconic product day after day. Not anymore.

Coca-Cola just launch a human resources initiative that kills voice mail. That's right, Coca-Cola employees will no longer be able to use voice mail. The reason is because it's just so darn time consuming, and frankly, nobody of any real efficiency uses it anyway. I personally think it's a great idea. I never use my own voice mail anyway. Text me, or I will just call when I see I missed your call. It's also a sign of the Millennial Generation, all 83 million strong, slowly starting to take over the American workplace. These are young adults, the oldest around 31 now, who were raised on technology, the internet, and a multi-tasking mentality. This generation's first representative to Congress was recently elected (she's a Republican, by the way), and they are now making Hyundai commercials with toys from the 1980s because, well, they are the demographic buying those kind of cars now. In twenty years those same toys will be doing Cadillac commercials.

Anyway, the death of voice mail at Coca-Cola is just another victory of Millennials Rising. In time, they will crowd out those pesky Baby Boomers, one of the most polarizing and privileged generations ever. (They are the ones leading grid-locks in Congress. They are also the ones born into the most economically advantageous period ever, when well paying union jobs were available for just a high school diploma, America had no competition because WWII made all of Europe and Asia bombed out, and you could go to college for virtually nothing if you so desired. Ironically, most Boomers see to forget this when they scold jobless, debt-loaded, Twitter-fingering Millenials for being "narcissistic") And P.S. Jean M. Twenge, you are an idiot.

So check your voice mail one last time, Boomers. You're irrelevancy is fast approaching, and Coca-Cola is helping to make it happen. 

Bottle Breakdown

Some news in the soda world. So the curvy Coca-Cola bottle is iconic. It's one of those American symbols. It's right up there with Chuck Taylor basketball shoes and the Chanel No. 5 bottle. I love that Coke bottle shape and think its a great move by Coke to fiercely protect it. Even in Australia.

Not similar enough

But a judge there didn't see it my light. After a four year battle, a judge in Australia said Pepsi's similar bottle in that country isn't enough of a trademark infringement. Coca-Cola now has to shell out Pepsi's legal costs for the lawsuit. Shame. It does go to show though that imitation is the best form of flattery. Coca-Cola has always been packaged better, and Pepsi knows it.

Santa is Back!

What this guy said. Seriously. I have been thinking it for years.

Basically, this blogger points out that Santa has been absent from Coke cans for three years. 2014 finally marks the return. I noticed the dearth of Santa when I started collecting soda cans back in 2012. Here's to many more years of Santa on the cans!

Happy Thanksgiving and Black Friday!

Yes, you read that title right. My wife and I are excited about both holidays. We are indeed thankful for the blessings we have in our lives, and then we go trample over people for cheap goods a mere few hours later. It's great. 

Black Friday!

Actually, we enjoy Black Friday because we love hanging out together in such a thrilling environment. Plus, we get all of our Christmas shopping done. By Sunday night, we should have all of our presents bought, wrapped, and stored in the attic until Christmas. See, we utterly desecrate the spirit of Thanksgiving so the month of Christmas can be spent in peace.

Anyway, I ran across this post from Coke last Thanksgiving all about Black Friday. My wife and I bring a little Coke for the road during our all night shopping, so I am glad Coca-Cola put this little fact sheet together. Go Coke! Coke taps into all seasons.

Doritos and Dew?

Pepsi owns Doritos. I've posted about the cross pollination between these two products before. The latest hybrid of Doritos and Pepsi involves Mt. Dew (which is Pepsi owned). Yup, we are talking about Doritos flavored Mt. Dew!

With Chips?

Don't get excited. This is just taste testing done at college campuses. But yes, there was a flavor reported to be Mt. Dewitos that tasted a little like nacho Cheese Doritos. I'll take a can of that if it ever comes out!

Turtle Power Cans

Sometimes I am just late to the soda can party. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot has already come and gone. Honestly, I never saw it, although I was mildly interested. I also didn't know that Crush soda was doing a promotion for the film.

How did I miss this?

I'm actually a little disappointed I didn't notice. I would have tried to collect the set. Instead, I ended up finding the Donatello can in a cooler at the local comic shop the other day. I shelled out a dollar for it. So I do have one. What's even more discouraging is they created a whole new flavor for Leonardo. It was Berry Punch. All the turtle flavors appear below.

Leonardo: Berry Punch

Raphael: Strawberry

Donatello: Grape

Michelangelo: Orange

April O'Neil: Pineapple

What my can looks like.

It's actually a swell promotion for Crush. The sodas match up with each turtle's eye-band color. And of course April O'Neil wears that odd yellow suit (I bet she is secretly the daughter of Curious George's dad) so her color is pineapple yellow. Pretty neat, really. And yes, as I finish typing this, I am actually feeling pretty glum about missing the boat on this. Maybe I will be able to trade for the others someday. I need to be more aware of the soda world.

Coke Wins the 2014 Elections!

If you paid attention to the 2014 midterm elections in the United States, you saw that Coca-Cola crushed the event. Yes, Coke is taking power and Pepsi is now regulated to the sidelines with a pretty much lame duck President.

Yes, I know it's really all about Republicans and Democrats and not about Coke and Pepsi. Still, I think its fair to say Coke can be a Republican symbol and Pepsi and be the Democratic one. The unofficial party colors can make a case for that. Republicans are red like Coke and Democrats are blue like Pepsi. Still not convinced? Well, I've said it before. Look at the advertising. Coca-Cola advertises old school. Coke is all about Christmas, cuddly polar bears, buying the whole darn world a Coke because its just so familiar and grand, just like the G.O.P. And Coke has Taylor Swift, a wanna-be pop star trying to "shake off" her country roots. And country music is conservative, my friends. And come on, Coke starts with a "C" just like "conservative."

Meanwhile, Pepsi is all about being hip, edgy, and on the cutting edge. Pepsi is about being you. Screw the establishment. Be an individual. A "taker" if you have to. X-Games stuff. Squat in the street in front of a corporation's high-rise and get blasted with tear gas. Go team You! And of course they have Beyonce. Forgive the stereotyping, but African Americans make up a solid base of the Democratic party. And then there is that whole new Pepsi symbol that mysteriously appeared in 2008. You know, the curvy Pepsi logo that looks an awfully lot like Obama's rising-sun-faux-agrarian campaign symbol. Yup, Pepsi is definitely Democratic.

So what does this mean? It means get ready to chug some Coke people whether you crave it out not. At the very least, all that Coke is gonna is going to at least block you from enjoying a Pepsi from the the White House anytime soon.