Sprite Fights Cancer!

Yeah, yeah, we know that soda is bad and makes people fat and is corrupting the world with bad business practices.  At least that's what wealthy, elite, Democrats tell us. Well imagine their faces when you tell them this little tidbit from your soda research: Sprite helps fight cancer!

2013 Mountain Dew White Out

Turns out researchers discovered that flat Sprite helps an anti-cancer drug be absorbed into the body more effectively.  Who knew?  So next time you chug a Sprite, know that you are not only supporting the NBA, but a tiny niche of cancer research.